Monday, November 3, 2008

Dear Christina

I was so excited to hear your voice for a mere 5 minutes last night. I apologize for calling you while you in bed with your man. I keep forgetting you have someone to love and hold at night now (even though you guys have been together for over a year now; I still secretly wish you were still single so you can be bitter with me. I'm kidding. Kinda.) I saw that you had commented on my blog at 1:49 am in the morning and in my haste I eagerly picked up the phone and dialed your number very quickly. Even though you were slightly irritated and tired, the tears almost came to my face when I heard that irritation creep into your voice. I miss that. I miss you slapping sense into me. Actually, I just miss you in general.

I am saddened that I won't be seeing you and Crystal this Thanksgiving. I would've loved to see your stupid face and Crystal's stupid face again. I am completely burnt out on Seattle. I've been up here for so long, I can't even remember home anymore. You guys were always home for me. California is just a place that houses the Hughes sisters and I wish I were back there again - just to see your stupid nasty-ass faces.

It has been a very long time since I've heard any news from you. I understand that you are very busy. You know, being fabulous and all in LA. With your fabulous friends and your fabulous city and all that shitz. But I really miss you. A lot. I have decided to take a "Carolyn" day and skip classes. I am currently sitting in the library, drinking Stumptown coffee, and dedicating this entry to you. I was just thinking of that time when you heartily skipped school with me and we flew in haste to San Francisco to see Conan O'Brien. Only you would do that with me. Only you understand my sad little obsession for the red-headed man. Even though we didn't get to see him, you waited in line with me for hours; and that has meant the world to me. Although, I am still kinda pissed that you didn't stop me from running into on-coming San Francisco traffic just to get a Conan hat. You just wanted a hat too - so you were willing to sacrifice me to recieve one. It's okay, I really wanted a hat too. And I'm still alive. So it all worked out in the end.

I am pretty sick of Seattle, not gonna lie. I have nothing going for me. I am a loser. I never finished that novel, you know. I know... I know.. you have always encouraged me to be a writer. You always believed in me. But, for right now, at this point in my life, I would rather play World of Warcraft and be the same old self-deprecating piece of shit like always. Never changing. I have always meant to dedicate my first book/novel/screenplay/whathaveyou to you. I even have the dedication all worked out:

To my friend, Christina (Minh Minh) Hughes - for teaching me how to put on make-up.

Like it? Before I met you, I was in an even worse slump then I am in now. You took me under your wing and showed me how to be a girl and clean myself up. Sadly, I have let myself go. I have no one to put makeup on in the morning. I look like complete shit on a daily basis. That's okay, I'm fine with that. It's not like I actually go anywhere. I still sit in the dark, staring at my computer screen for hours on end. I have grown disgustingly pale. Even paler then I was in California. But you know, I couldn't escape the sunshine there. There's simply nothing to escape here. I have been called malnourished by Lisa Chang and Albino by a homeless man. I hate Seattle.

I hope everything is going well for you back home. Give my love to Crystal. I hope you are still being charming, intelligent, and still retaining that gusto of yours. You know the gusto. "I want to change the world, I want to save the environment, I want to live in Africa and volunteer, I want to be fabulous for the rest of my life." I have always admired that in you. You make me want to be a better person. But, alas, I am still an ass and I've grown somewhat dick-ish. This city makes me want to punch babies and kick puppies.

I love you and miss you terribly.

Your pal,
Carolyn K. Huynh

P.S. You weren't wrong when you said that all the losers come to Seattle cause they never made it anywhere else. I'm here, ain't I?


TomatoOnWheat said...

I am now a follower of your fabulous blog. See, I can use "fabulous" too, and yes, in the same sentence as the name "Carolyn."

Also, you do have someone to wear makeup for--the Jewish boy. If you snag him, we can both be dating from the elite coterie of God's chosen people.

Lastly, stop getting sentimental. Of course I love you, but woman, get it together. Seattle is wonderful and years from now you'll realize that you loved it there. Are you coming home for winter break? I have a week until I leave for Viet Nam.

Carolyn said...

You make me wimper and blubber like a pussy. I MISS YOU SO MUCH.

I don't know when I'll be back home. When do you leave for Vietnam?